A Beautiful Mind.

I was once the lover of a beautiful mind. I loved its thoughts with all my soul and heart. Filled with wonder at the magical sensations.. such deeply felt feelings of reverence and awe.. I was captivated.. mesmerized.. scared of my own feelings that were drawn so strongly to simple thoughts.. simple words.. such beautiful thoughts..

I wanted to sit for hours and explore that mind. I wanted to know everything it ever thought. Every feeling it ever felt, every emotion that ever made it ache or laugh. And I wanted to know it all with a burning fervor. The beautiful mind became my only passion. I was obsessed with something worth obsession..

I wanted to explore it, feel it, understand it, grasp it, capture it.. and then again release it.. I wanted it to become Mine.. and yet, to stay as its very own. To think its beautiful independent thoughts and let me be the silent worshipper..

It was such a beautiful enigma. I wanted to explore it’s hidden secrets, unravel all of its mysteries and strangely, I knew that its mystery for me will never ever end. That even when I have understood it Completely.. it will still be so out of reach... some thing that is not made to be understood, but to be kept hidden forever.

Nothing had ever touched me so deeply. or moved me so very completely.

The magic would have stayed.. but I couldn’t afford to let it any longer. Suddenly just feeling wasn’t enough. And remaining a fascinated child became an option I refused to give myself. I had to put out my own curiosity.. my own interest. I had to shut out my attraction that was becoming painful, out of hand.

So many years.. but even today I know that my passion for that beautiful mind remains. Silent always silent. hidden and protected. Yet alive inside me, like I can only know.